I’m having a hard time believing in heaven. How can we live our lives knowing that one day its all going to just be..gone. Black. Nothing left. No more music, no more colors, no more sounds, no more beautiful faces, no more anything. It’s so hard to even think about that, it almost makes me panic. I’m scared of dying. I’m scared that when that “final” day comes, I won’t be ready. And when I DO die, it really IS the end. There won’t be any shiny gate, there won’t be any familiar faces. There won’t be anything. And if there in fact IS a heaven, will I remember my life? Will I remember my friends, the good times, the bad times? I’m scared of not being able to have my memories. To not be able to remember what it’s like to kiss a boy. To not be able to remember laughing so loud and so much that it hurts your stomach. To not remember what it feels like to be alive. It’s so scary. It’s not fair. Why put us here on earth, and make us live in such a perfect world and then take it all away? It doesn’t make any sense.
